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Natural Awakenings Oklahoma

How To Get Your Groove Back

Apr 04, 2023 01:03AM ● By Charity Danker, LPC
How To Get Your Groove Back
It may seem like intimacy in your relationship is a thing of the past once you have kids. But it  doesn't have to be that way! Here are some tips on how to get your groove back and reignite the spark in your relationship.

Talk about your feelings with your partner to get on the same page. Be bold and give them your raw truth.
When it comes to forging a connection and regaining intimacy in a relationship with sexual dysfunction or an imbalance in desire, it is important to talk about your feelings with your partner. Both parties need to share their raw truth and allow vulnerability for this connection to form. By being open and honest while having these conversations, both partners can gain insights into each other's needs and be on the same page. This open dialogue should also help identify areas where mutual satisfaction can be achieved. Communication is key when trying to get intimacy back in a relationship, so taking that bold step of talking about your feelings can be incredibly rewarding.

Make time for intimacy by scheduling it into your week.
Scheduling time for intimacy can be a great way to get that spark back in a relationship. By  planning sex into your week, it can increase your overall satisfaction and make the experience far more exciting. Preparing for the night by relaxing, eating lighter meals, and taking on less work or stress during the day may help create an extra layer of anticipation. Plus, users often fantasize about their partner more during the day, leading to an enhanced connection between them.  Scheduling sex allows couples to surrender to each other in a consensual, safe space with plenty of exciting expectations and positive results.

Try something new together to spice things up
Trying something new together is a great way to spice things up! Different types of sexual play, such as bondage, spanking, tickling with feathers or enjoying sensual or energetic play can give you both a new and exciting experience. Exploring role play and fantasy talk can also encourage intimacy. Additionally, watching spicy videos together or trying out sex toys and oils can help make each experience unique. If a couple is experiencing an imbalance of desire or sexual dysfunction and wants to regain their intimacy, trying something new is an excellent opportunity to do just that!

Be present during intimate moments and put away all distractions.
Creating intimacy in a relationship affected by sexual dysfunctions or discrepancies in desire can be difficult. However, it's essential to be present during those intimate moments and put away all distractions so that mindfulness can be directed to the body and breathing. Be sure to put aside any to-do lists, insecurities, and worries about performance. Instead, take pride in being a Sex God or Goddess and wholly own that moment. Allow yourself to feel pleasure from your partner's touch without fear or hesitation – it can create an experience of heightened connection with them! Ultimately, mindfulness during intimate times can strengthen the bond between two people by allowing for a deeper understanding of each other’s wants and needs.

Communicate openly and honestly about what you enjoy and don't.
Effective communication is integral in maintaining intimacy in relationships; whenever there is an imbalance of desire, you must openly express what you are uncomfortable with. Give clear yet gentle instructions about how something feels—Things like "slower," "faster," "right there," "a little to the left or right," "that perfect spot," or "that feels good" can help your partner identify the sensations wanted in bed. A heartfelt compliment might also help you regain the spark of intimacy – telling your partner, "I love it when you touch me here or there," expressing gratitude for stimulating activities spiced lovingly with certain toys to keep the relationship alive. It all boils down to keeping a line of honest communication open along respective boundaries to ensure both parties get their needs met while bringing each other pleasure.

Don't be afraid to ask for help from a therapist or sex coach if you feel stuck.
When sexual dysfunction or an imbalance in desire frequency can make it hard to get intimacy back in a relationship, don't be afraid to ask for help. Working with a therapist or sex coach can be invaluable in finding achievable solutions to the challenges facing you and your partner. Experts are there to provide support, and both parties in the relationship can benefit from looking at things from a new perspective. Remember, you've got nothing to lose by seeking assistance and everything to gain, so don't hesitate any longer if it feels like you're stuck in a rut!

If you're struggling with sexual dysfunction or an imbalance in your sex life, it's essential to talk to your partner and figure out a plan that works for both of you. You may need to schedule sex into your week, try something new together, or be more present during intimate moments. Communicating openly and honestly about what you're enjoying and what you're not is key. If you're feeling stuck, don't be afraid to ask for help from a therapist or sex coach. With some effort, you can get your intimacy back on track.

Charity Danker, LPC
Certified Sex Therapist and OM Coach, Sexologist
email: [email protected]
phone: 405-242-3611
mobile: 405-420-7877
Evanescence Counseling | Desire OKC, 2932 NW 122nd Ste 5 (Bradley Square Offices) Oklahoma City 73120

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